


always gold to me

by SydneyHorses



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Blow Jobs, Established Relationship, M/M, Porn with Feelings, this is very soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:08:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23678149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SydneyHorses/pseuds/SydneyHorses
Summary: Tomorrow, they leave for the final campaign against Enbarr. The night before, Felix and Dimitri steal a quiet moment for themselves, away from everything else.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 13
Kudos: 80





	always gold to me

**Author's Note:**

> this is My Brand which means it's very sappy and soft but also vaguely bittersweet. they're in love! this is set at the very very end of azure moon - i hope you enjoy! title taken from always gold by radical face!

They leave for Enbarr in the morning. Felix watches the sun set behind Garreg Mach and thinks to himself that this is the last sunset he could ever see. He isn’t usually this melancholy, but after all, this could very well be the last day of his life.

“I thought I might find you up here,” Dimitri says, as careful and measured as the sound of his footsteps on the flagstones.

Felix had sequestered himself on the third floor’s garden balcony. He sits curled up on the bench, his legs tucked neatly under him. He can see the sun for a little longer, and it’s rare that anyone else comes up here. “What do you want?” he asks, not turning his gaze away from the horizon. If it’s his last sunset, he’s going to savor it.

Dimitri stops next to the bench, following Felix’s gaze to look at the sky. “It’s beautiful,” he remarks.

Felix grunts, “It’s alright.” 

“Oh?” Dimitri says. Felix is being intentionally contrary and Dimitri knows it. “How would you improve it?”

Felix extends his feet so he’s taking up a little more of the bench. If Dimitri wants to sit, he’ll have to move Felix to do so. “More purple,” Felix says, narrowing his eyes and trying to analyze the sunset. Sylvain would probably have something to say about color balancing or whatever, but he’s not here.

Dimitri makes a noise of agreement and picks Felix’s legs up so he can sit down on the bench. He resettles Felix’s legs on his lap as soon as he sits, and Felix bites back a smile, stretching his legs out so as much of him is touching Dimitri as possible. Dimitri rests his hands on Felix’s legs, the warmth from his palms seeping into Felix through his pants. “I think it’s lovely,” he says. “Even without more purple.”

“You would,” Felix says. “I’m sure you think every sunset is lovely.” He darts his eyes to the side, trying to catch a stealthy glimpse of Dimitri’s face. Even though they’re… intimate now, Felix still doesn’t know how to look at Dimitri. He’d spend every waking moment looking at Dimitri, if only he could cope with the burning feeling in his chest that it incites.

“I do,” Dimitri agrees. He turns his head, catching Felix staring. He smiles, the expression lighting his whole face up. “But not as lovely as you.”

Felix rolls his eyes and tears his gaze away, looking back to the sunset. “Did you learn that line from Sylvain?”

Dimitri reaches out and laces their fingers together. “It’s the truth.”

Felix’s face grows warm despite himself, “Seiros, must you?”

“It is the truth,” Dimitri repeats, squeezing his hand. “Felix, look at me.”

He doesn’t want to, but they could die in the morning and the light breeze brings with it the faint smell of flowers. It’s the kind of evening people write about in a story, with the sunset turning everything golden and soft. Felix swallows and meets Dimitri’s gaze.

Dimitri’s one remaining eye shines bright blue, more vivid than the entire gold-tinged garden around them. He’s smiling, his expression bright and open like it was when they were children. Felix’s face warms, but he doesn’t look away. If he dies tomorrow, he wants to have drunk Dimitri in. 

Felix brings their clasped hands to his mouth and kisses the back of Dimitri’s hand. Despite how frequently his thoughts keep turning to the approaching battle, this quiet moment with Dimitri feels infinite. Dimitri beams at him like he’s been given a gift. Felix scoffs and looks back to the sunset, but he keeps the other’s hand in his lap.

The sun is almost below the horizon, but the sky will stay golden and pink for a few more minutes. He meant it when he said it needed more purple earlier, but it truly is a magnificent evening. Felix has no aptitude nor desire for painting, but the tapestry of colors in the sky above them almost makes him wish for a paintbrush.

“Felix?” Dimitri asks.

Felix tears his eyes away from the sunset, “Hm?”

Dimitri’s expression is pathetic, truly, “Come here?”

Felix sighs, trying to sound put-upon and not delighted. He pulls his feet out of Dimitri’s lap and stands, stopping in front of Dimitri, “Well?”

Dimitri smiles up at him and rests his hands on Felix’s hips, pulling him down so that he’s stradling Dimitri’s lap. As much as Felix would like to pretend otherwise, he’s happy to go where Dimitri wants him. “I missed you,” Dimitri says.

Felix rolls his eyes, “You saw me at the war council meeting.”

“I miss you every time I’m not around you,” Dimitri replies, painfully earnest.

The tips of Felix’s ears burn, “Your sentimentality is ridiculous.”

Dimitri kisses Felix’s forehead, “Maybe so.”

Felix winds his fingers into the fur of Dimitri’s cape. Beneath him, Dimitri makes a pleased noise that’s so delightful Felix can’t respond in any other way but to lean down and kiss him.

He’d intended the kiss to be gentle, just like the evening around them, but it’s difficult to hold onto such intentions when Dimitri is warm beneath him and his tongue is licking lazily into his mouth, causing Felix’s toes to curl in his boots. Dimitri’s arms tighten around him as they kiss. Felix couldn’t move even if he wanted to, which he should really be more upset about. He doesn’t need Dimitri to hold him this tenderly, even if it also makes him feel as if he has no purpose other than Dimitri’s enjoyment.

Such a thing does not seem like a particularly bad fate.

Felix shivers and shifts closer, trying to eliminate any remaining sliver of space between the two of them. “Goddess,” Dimitri whispers when Felix pulls back for air. “You’re perfect.”

“Stop talking,” Felix says, bending back down to shut Dimitri up. The things he says… they’re too much. Felix doesn’t know how to tell Dimitri he loves him, so he kisses along his neck and winds his hand into Dimitri’s hair instead.

Underneath him, Dimitri gasps, one of his hands sliding down to rest on Felix’s thigh. Felix closes his teeth on the soft skin under Dimitri’s jaw, worrying a mark there. He smiles against the skin; Dimitri’s armor will surely cover it, but Felix will know that underneath all that blood and metal, Dimitri is his.

“Felix,” Dimitri’s voice is at its best when he’s gasping out his name. Felix kisses Dimitri, fully intending to pull away for good afterwards. “Felix,” Dimitri says again, squeezing his thigh. “I want you. Now, like this, if you’ll have me.”

Felix’s face colors and he looks away. Only the faintest traces of the sunset remain, streaks of pale pink coloring the sky just above the horizon. “We’re in public,” Felix says, even as he’s unbuttoning his shirt.

“No one comes up here,” Dimitri replies, his gaze roving over Felix’s chest. “Goddess, you’re beautiful.”

Felix colors and looks off to the side. Dimitri laces his hands through the top of Felix’s hair, not pulling it - yet - just gently holding onto him. Felix rests his hand on top of Dimitri’s, “How do you want me?”

Dimitri inhales sharply, his hand tightening on Felix’s thigh. “Any way you’ll have me,” he whispers.

There’s a biting insult on the tip of his tongue, but they could die tomorrow. This could be the last time Felix ever gets to be with Dimitri like this, and he doesn’t want this to be a battle as well. Instead, he slides off of Dimitri’s lap, falling to his knees before him.

Dimitri’s hand stays in his hair, not quite pushing him to the ground, but almost. His legs part without Felix having to ask, and he moves forward so he’s between them. He unlaces Dimitri’s pants, looking up at him. “Well?”

Dimitri laughs, “Do you even have to ask?”

Felix smirks and drags his fingers over the shape of Dimitri’s cock, cupping him through his clothes. As much as Felix would like to draw this out, it isn’t that kind of night.

He sighs, trying to sound put-upon and not as overwhelmingly fond as he feels, and pulls Dimitri out of his pants. He’s already half hard, and Felix wraps his hand around the base, glancing up at Dimitri through his eyelashes before bending his head and taking Dimitri’s length into his mouth. For all that Felix would like to pretend otherwise, he’ll never get tired of serving his king.

Dimitri’s well-endowed, to say the least, and as much practice as he’s gotten, Felix still isn’t able to fit the whole thing in his mouth. Dimitri inhales sharply as Felix curls his tongue around the underside of Dimitri’s cock, and Felix smiles around the length, although he’s sure it isn’t recognizable with his mouth stretched around Dimitri’s dick. He’s content to stay here until his lungs give out, working his jaw and feeling the flex of Dimitri’s thighs beneath him, hearing the hitch in his breath and the slight gasps that fall from his lips.

“Felix, look at me.”

Felix hates eye contact, he truly does. He hates that he can’t hide whatever emotion he’s feeling when confronted with it, and he hates the way that meeting Dimitri’s gaze makes him feel weak. But Dimitri’s voice, though strained, is commanding, and so Felix looks up through his eyelashes, hollowing his cheeks around Dimitri’s cock and bobbing his head.

Dimitri’s eye is glassy, and his mouth is open slightly. The hand in Felix’s hair tugs, forcing him a little more onto his cock, and Felix swallows. He can barely breathe around the weight of it in his mouth, and his jaw is starting to ache, but none of that feels important.

He twists his wrist around Dimitri and takes a little more of him into his mouth. Felix gags and pulls back with a wet pop, coughing to the side.

“Felix, are you-”

“I’m fine,” Felix snaps, although his voice sounds strained, even to himself. He bends back down, swallowing as much as he can in one quick motion. Dimitri lifts his hand, as if to give Felix some respite. Felix makes a noise of annoyance and reaches up to grab Dimitri’s hand, forcing it back onto his head.

Dimitri laughs and tangles his fingers into Felix’s hair. His nails scratch at his scalp and Felix hums around Dimitri’s dick, arching his back and grinding his hips down into his own lap. “Ah, Felix,” Dimitri moans and closes his hand around Felix’s hair, pulling him further onto his cock. 

Felix groans, his eyes sliding shut. He hates to admit it, even to himself, but he loves when Dimitri uses him like this. If his gag reflex were a little better, he’d just sit there and let Dimitri fuck into his mouth, abandoning all restraint and treating him as nothing more than something to use for his own entertainment. 

He’s gotten himself off to that thought more than once.

“Fe,” Dimitri says, his voice tight. Felix pulls back with a pop and then takes Dimitri’s cock back into his mouth immediately, his hand moving around the base. Dimitri’s hand in his hair tightens even further, and he thrusts his hips up into Felix’s mouth. Felix moans and Dimitri cries out above him, coming down Felix’s throat.

Felix pulls back, wiping come off the corner his mouth and looking up at Dimitri. He’s beautiful, his legs splayed open and a flush peeking out from the top of his shirt collar. He’s still almost entirely clothed, and the sight of him stirs something in Felix’s gut. He looks like a king, and Felix is just a subject, kneeling at his feet for a scrap of attention. He doesn’t want Dimitri to leave him here, hard and aching, but he entertains the thought of it for a moment. He thinks he could be content to stay here for as long as he’s permitted to do so. 

It’s near dark now, and it seems to Felix that Dimitri is the only thing he can still see. Dimitri’s hand in his hair loosens, and he pushes it back from his face, stroking his fingers through it lightly. “Come here,” he says, and Felix rises and settles himself on Dimitri’s lap.

Dimitri’s hand cups his face, and he leans forward to kiss Felix. Felix is so turned on that even Dimitri’s tender touches feel good, and he grinds his hips down into Dimitri’s lap. “I’ll take care of you,” Dimitri says, pulling Felix’s head back by his hair and exposing his throat.

Felix groans, his eyes drifting closed. Dimitri bends down, biting hard at the skin at the base of Felix’s throat. The pain keeps him grounded, even as Dimitri’s free hand winds between the two of them and slides under Felix’s waistband, fisting his hand around Felix’s cock.

Dimitri likes to make him beg, likes to touch Felix until he can barely stand it and is crying out for something he barely even knows how to ask for anymore. Tonight, though, he doesn’t know if he’d know how to beg even if Dimitri asked him to. Nothing they’ve done has been particularly overwhelming or out of the ordinary, but Felix feels sick with his affection. It’s overflowing from him, and it’s all that he can do to rock his hips into Dimitri’s hand until he comes with a strangled groan.

As saccharine as that had been, they’re still mostly clothed. There are plenty of perfectly good beds in the monastery that they could have retired to, but instead Felix had chosen to drop to his knees for Dimitri outside, in the archbishop’s private quarters of all places. “I can’t believe I gave you a blowjob in the archbishop’s garden,” Felix, tucking his head in the crook between Dimitri’s head and shoulder.

Dimitri’s hand strokes down his back, his hand warm against Felix’s bare skin, “Ah, yes.” He pauses. “Let’s… not tell her about that when we rescue her from Enbarr.”

Felix chuckles and noses at Dimitri’s neck, his eyes drifting closed. In a few minutes he’ll feel sticky and disgusting, but at the moment, it’s nice, to have some respite from the rest of the world. The sunset is over now, leaving them nothing to see each other by but the light of the moon and the twinkling of the stars above them. Felix opens his eyes once more, blinking slowly, and turns his head to look at the sliver of the sky he can see beyond Dimitri’s form. The sky is vast and clear, without a cloud to muddy any of it. Felix looks up at it. Glenn had known some about the stars, but Felix had never learned the trick for it the way his older brother had. To him, they’ll never be more than lights in the sky.

A stray breeze sweeps across the balcony, and Felix shivers despite himself. Dimitri hums and squeezes Felix’s arm, “Here, stand.”

Felix climbs reluctantly to his feet, fixing his pants as best he can. His hair is shot to all hell, large chunks of it falling out of his ponytail. He sighs and yanks his hair tie out, combing his fingers through his hair to try to get it somewhat presentable. He’s lost track of where his shirt ended up, but that hardly matters. Dimitri rises to his feet, unclasping his heavy fur cloak and settling it around Felix’s shoulders. 

“I don’t need your help,” Felix says, even as he wraps Dimitri’s cloak tighter around himself. The night air, while pleasant, has a sharp bite in it, and Felix is in nothing but his thin sleep pants. Dimitri’s cloak carries an echo of his warmth, and the weight of it around him feels comforting, feels safe, even.

Dimitri half-smiles, looking every bit the king that Felix knows he can be. “No, of course not.” Felix glares at him and nestles further into Dimitri’s cloak. Now that the sun’s gone, the gold-soaked evening has given way to a chilly night, and he’s glad for the warmth. Dimitri laughs, the full-bellied kind of laughs that kings do for show at banquets, and Felix smiles despite himself. “It’s not pity,” he says, stepping closer to Felix. “I like seeing you in my clothes.”

“Do you?” Felix asks flatly. “I hadn’t noticed.” As if Dimitri doesn’t drape his ridiculous blanket of a cloak over him at the mere suggestion of a breeze.

Almost as in response to Felix’s contrariness, another gust of wind whips through the balcony, carrying with it the scent of a fire from somewhere. The monastery is, as a rule, more temperate than Faerghus, but tonight it feels like they could be at home, with the clear scent of woodsmoke filling their lungs and the crisp air of the north. Dimitri must sense it as well, for he lifts his head like a dog scenting the wind and closes his eye, looking so at peace that Felix longs for Faerghus in a way he hasn’t in months.

“What are you thinking about?” Felix asks, surprising himself.

Dimitri walks over to the edge of the balcony, leaning against the stone parapet surrounding the balcony. He looks smaller without his cloak on, although Felix is unsure if it's because of that or because Felix just had his cock in his mouth. Dimitri sighs, looking less like the Savior King and more like Dimitri. Savior Kings are all well and good, but Felix prefers Dimitri. “It’s a nice night,” Dimitri says. “I’m looking forward to more like it.”

Felix joins Dimitri at the balcony, turning his gaze onto the same view as his king, “Me too.”

**Author's Note:**

> find me on twitter @edelgardlesbian and on tumblr @edelgardlesbians!


End file.
